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Being Empty : Being Filled

by Listener

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1.
* any thing can be made with your own thoughts with your own hands with a face and name, using the business end * for when you have to jump without being brave enough starting from where you’re at knowing where you’re at * there’s plenty of disappointment and no way to keep it I was the one you poured in to I’m more an ambulance and not a doctor * we’ll go on to other places, hold it loose sewing us together, folded over, feeding the machine. That's some kind of life you got. It grows the more it takes. * covered in a frail confidence painting our skin with the thoughts within If it's sad or if it's scary We are each others * we are hope, you are even if the voices carry still making it like they used to alive inside the stones * throw us anywhere but don’t stay face down or think the words that keep you there backbone breaker, life and time taker * how many days have you been loved in what ways, outside of yourself always beside you. the way your soul is attached * riveted in to place, overlapped the best days of our lives are the ones we’re alive making our attempt at existing * so more work can be done covering each other over painting ourselves in our canvas take care, take chances. That's some kind of life you got. It grows the more it takes.
2.
she turns over and over again burning, or more glowing in that way lets make a fire she said. and use our lives to fan the flames It’s a privilege to see it happen, with full hands, never still on fire she moves with every turning backwards above the ground while her husband lays there still pushing memories around. in all the corners, in every town. across the pines.... the ants in east Texas plan their lives, in cities below the power lines. but we won’t ever know….About that thin wire Little lightning pieces….vibrating electric it’s on that thin wire, we’re all enemy, all family. The sun is making dances up ahead heating up as far as I can see is it this same way everywhere? the way a road can make a wave right in the middle of it all what does that kind of medicine do will it work the same way every time? or next time. all fingers pointing at the edge you said to keep making it until some thing makes sense it’s ok…no it’s not, it won’t stop moving it’s always changing hold on how does the future ever get made? from what we say…. but for action and grace, or the time that we make the innocence of that is not insignificant. out here hunting for the start, but it’s just the opposite of that. two hearts in the stands near the coast, hold on! hold on with your hands wherever you go no matter where you go inside of you is home Build it strong, keep us safe, that’s the way grow it high, in every way, make a home, keep us safe but they won’t ever know….About that thin wire Little lightning pieces….vibrating electric On that thin wire, we’re all enemy, all family it’s on that thin wire, we’re all holding on to moving back and forth, vibrating electric in the wind on that thin wire, little folded fingers, all family swaying back and forth, vibrating electric in the wind on that thin wire, little folded fingers on that old wire, we’re all enemy, all family
3.
It's been 30 days, maybe 34 since I left my house, tossed and grown out the fires burn below the pistons creak and groan under my feet, the tension grows built up like the leaves around my door they can say it better than I can after months of neglect I can start over again if I would just let it this is how we live when we live somewhere with quiet nights inside, making plans to make a life To keep it all safe inside and outside dear anyone, do you know what that’s like remembering all of it our building pieces, stacked on top hanging over each other and packed in Keep it simple, keep it When you don't go on; your song lives on When I don't go on the channel turns against the keel there’s no turning back thumbing my buttons nervously in my bed, under cold sheets hiding the thunder inside of me my young wife made this shirt, I’m turning in the surf with my hat in my hand and my feet off the ground at least it’s a start if it has to be I’ll starve on my own payroll trying to make living better, I think that was the goal the oil moves, feeds the machine, the pressure builds the war outside is rattling, pushing smoke out past the rings my hearts been dreaming about sparks this heavy pull, is strengthening, my last resolve it’s all burnt up, the fire’s gone, you can have it all an early morning calls, and I’m not there to start my watch is on the table, ticking in the dark there’s money in the walls of my heart and I left it there for you even If it all has to end I'm still glad you were my friend. may it cure what ails you and never fail you three fingers in the wind. yeah, three fingers in the wind. When you don't go on, your song lives on When I don't go on, sing along me your song lives on, our song lives on I’ll sing along with you, so sing along with me
4.
Add Blue 04:26
She was standing in the dark, pockets glowing blue green in the backyard, in the floating world, on the in between the day will have its troubles on its own for the shells of men, not meant to be everything can’t really be anything that’s not given or grown the violence of it all. its always risky movement, stay down, stay still in the unseen trying to see behind the outside there’s a beauty in almost everything how have you not seen a thing? but instead of getting over she got out like a fish made of bricks I fell for you, now I’m sinking too her loose teeth moving like piano keys, getting played from lost memories head on the pillow, mind in the clouds Like a bird looking up for safety, but it has no home to go to it doesn’t know what we know, can’t really go where we go she said: I can’t. I can’t see. I can’t see out of here. so hand in hand we swam across the lake the water warm against our legs the only light to find us was the moon. we went all the way from rock to rock we jumped across across the bay half blind we stole each others hearts we knew we’d be there soon. She was standing in the sparks, pockets glowing blue and green in her backyard, in the floating world, on the in between feet covered in gold, skin blue and glow every ray an arm of reaching light each road different like the snowflakes in her eyes. driving somewhere that isn’t here sleeping in strange cities our bodies foreign to ourselves well, what’s inside. all glowing bright behind the teeth right there making soft and weak instead of getting over she got out like a fish made out of bricks I fell for you, now I’m sinking too just add blue. as long as we’re alive me and you we are love together when we’re together all crazy inside our rib cages behind our teeth and voice taking stars for forest fires our fingers scattered in our fists holding on to the films we make while our legs feed the wolf starting with myself staring at your teeth trying to see what you’re saying stabbing and pushing your soul through mine We used to live here. and we will again no doubt I'll let you try and figure it out. while I figure it out you had it all. you had it all together. you had it all figured out. I can’t. I can’t see.. I can’t see out of here.
5.
Darling you, so bloodshot and new what a view, all torn down and true Darling you, so bloodshot and new all of you, torn down so torn down and true — Drunk on the church steps again this time it’s for real, broken head in my hands Sweetness, you’re all bloodshot and new all of you torn down, so broken down I can’t say for sure if it’s just in my mind but there are cracks everywhere that’s what it feels like inside of me — Darling you, so bloodshot and new all of you, so torn down so torn down and true Darling you, all bloodshot and new what a view, all torn down all torn down and if love never dies, we’re alive. we’re alive somewhere too. — drunk near these new graves I bet dug to make it easy for us all to get in when you get this I’ll be gone I’ll be out living forever in my wrongs staring at the walls move the cracks in the ceiling. I can hear you inside, I don’t belong to me if I can remember the tension and all the ways to safety, I think we’ll fit together in time. you’re all I ever wanted was your life all I ever wanted was your life all I ever wanted was your life — when I dream about us in the future, we are not alone. all I’ve ever wanted was you and your life, and to make a home together. I’m not long or much for this world. the field corn grows and then it goes. I didn’t want to live yesterday, but here I am there’s still more maps to make. you’re all I ever wanted. — drunk again, that’s no way to begin I keep trying to hold on with open hands unhooking my thoughts from whats been dragging it around. it’s too much to keep, everything that I’ve found and how could I? every thought I have and why? all I ever wanted was your life. you’re all I ever wanted was your life. all I ever wanted was your life. you’re all I ever wanted.
6.
it adds up spending a lifetime chasing shadows around trying to change where the sun comes from tracking dots on a screen, that could just be birds or some one or thing that wants to come in to your home and live there instead of you You've got panic in your eyes, and in your mind built like the columns in the sky you made for us all to climb on but that all got pulled down, and you had to watch it digging more holes to pay for your principles. that just get filled up, it got too much to take in. this, this, this, is this what you thought it would be, wanted it to be? made it all up in your mind about it, is this where you thought it would go? one too many times taken away without anybody caring. It was all too early alone in your hotel room. letting that broken heart guide you it’s only showing you more of what you’ve been having. behind your door on the 33rd story the only friends on your side are the birds on your window not the ones that want to take everything you’ve made and use it for their own and tell you nothing you wanted to make made sense do you want to tear the world apart or the one inside of you. this, this, this, is this what you thought it would be, wanted it to be? made it all up in your mind about it, is this where you thought it would go? the interchange, the currents on your fingernails the energy in the sky where everyone can see traced over and over above the trees and inside of them the birds that fly free and the ones that stay they’re made the same, but what makes them brave I think it’s struggle, pacing over above the trees and on them the towers, the gravity of it, the walls that get built out of necessity or to rip the world apart and make a space by cutting out the trees all around them The burden of being connected, the risk of failure and no reward sit down, be slow, where else can you go? it won’t erase all the places you’ve come from. Is this what you thought it would be? cruel world, in the hands of so few where everyone can be of use you want gold you can have it, dig in the ground and question, ask questions you’re made of the same things you’re going into that same ground. is this what you wanted it to be? giving ‘em both barrels, whatever it takes and picking up the pieces later fighting to come alive wanting to want to fix what’s broke a ghost living inside of broken rusty skin this! is this the way you thought it would go? still good, mostly new, with a brilliant love to give inside with nothing to hide dozens have failed, I dare you to try getting it all out, leaving it all behind it’s hard to believe it’s killing you, but it’s killing you this, is this what you thought it would be?
7.
October is my favorite color, and you you’re growing on me. this is real life like the others, I can see it but it’s not real. in the window to the world, mirrors moving all around her. tubes breaking up the girl, there was no way but your light found her. good morning at the speed of sound! you want to be her lonely sun. you want to be the only one. hey buddy she was beautiful, her glow moves on forever. floating past the stars, beyond where we ever will go. you thought staying in that bottle would help your march near the edge. or living in her promises, said she’d follow you to the end. but that’s just what you wanted, you know you always did. no regrets and no surrender, no excuses, no pretend but home is not a place, It’s where you fill in the blanks. it’s not a hologram, it’s not for you to break. hey buddy she was beautiful, she’ll always be your first. right there how you remember, past where we ever will go. and the lights have to be bright! to see anything at all. You gave —> You were —> You thought —> You made they took —> they bent —> they threw away. you didn’t want it in your house refused to use it yourself. you lived —> you dreamed —> you built —> you caved they took —> it all —> they got their way. you didn’t want it in your house. refused to use it yourself. why did you make it in the first place? why did you make it? you weren't built for war like that, I don’t think you had a fight. as if money and some cigarettes would take it all off your mind. but that’s just how it happens, when you’re not looking, then it’s the end. for all your perfect planning, the good intentions in your head. each one you make goes out. you could have sold it all out. hey buddy she was beautiful, she’ll always be by your side far out past the clouds, beyond where we ever will go. she was the first you sent away her light lives on electrically that made it all worthwhile why did you make it in the first place? you took us all out to the moon you promised you would be there too and that made it all worthwhile why did you make it in the first place? why did you make it?
8.
9.
Right there… what you’re saying is everything I wish I could But the thoughts get lost, and I think I'm lost for good I'm learning to paint small, but I have to be still And that one shines, but still there I go again painting with my ideas, a little strokes, a little tears I can't stop these shaky hands…from mixing everything up and I wander but what’s really being lost enough? Not all who wonder are lost in thought not all who give live all they’ve got like a thousand suns bursting at once are only a spark of the mightiest one but that doesn’t stop the planets from spinning month after heavy month. into years that I forget memories and friends years I get to live lucky and try to mend crossing over back again, over and back again with every line, trying to dig in crossing over and back again I am become the destroyer of worlds and when the bomb drops, my heart drops too and doubt sets in, please hope begin make a way, make it calm for everything that flies inside The sky? This is it? but everyone can see this. no one owns it but we all do until we’re all satisfied shaky knees, shaky thoughts shaky near the business end, where I see it all get lost the things I made become the things I’ve forgot this is what you wanted me to build, or that’s what I thought In battle, in the forest, at the top in the mountains, On the dark great sea, in the midst of javelins and arrows, In sleep, in confusion, in the depths of shame, The good that we’ve done before, defends even us. even poor little us.
10.
this is how it’s going to be striking while the iron’s still warm while you’re not afraid to die shielded with science from fear of certain death spending more on killing than anything else propped up. walls on the backs of our neighbors giving half your life for land no one can ever really own asking yourself how did I get here again? bow down or you’ll be singled out face and palms up where we can see ‘em on your backs until the tires give out the hole we build inside is a gift never tired again. do you buy it? what kind of life is this? don’t let go of the desk in front of you the house that can never really be yours surrounded by armor bought with priceless time to keep the calm inside broken jar, damaged people nothing to say? biting your tongue asking yourself how did I get here again? bow down or you’ll be singled out face and palms up where we can see ‘em on your backs until the tires give out the hole we build inside is a gift Plague Doctor. part 2 (Garrett Morgan) *In my dumb mind I don't recognize myself do you remember me? drawing circles around my memories *setting traps for them, setting myself up making a cocoon breathing *filling it with medicine being empty it’s just as big as being filled I think this is a stop sign it’s hard to tell *the heart in my head is aching from colliding head on and I have a smokey mind *selling myself on caution first with the color, then the good feeling I had a daydream. I have them every day. *and in most every way my future lives inside so I try and pay attention because I know it comes from somewhere *even if I can’t remember even it it goes to nowhere death rattles on without me *or maybe that’s my lungs or the sound of my heart collapsing help! I am alive.

credits

released February 2, 2018

Written by: Dan Smith (Listener Supported ASCAP) & Kris Rochelle (Coffee Sweats Publishing ASCAP)
Recorded at: Glow in the Dark Studios, Atlanta Georgia USA
Produced by: Josh Scogin, Nate Washburn, Kris Rochelle, Dan Smith
Mixed by: Nate Washburn
Mastered by: Greg Reierson (Rare Form Mastering)
Artwork by: Jesse Reno
Copyright 2018

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Listener

Hi, we are a talk music band from the USA called Listener. We have been around since 2002. We would love to come to your city and play.

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